Sports Day

Today it was my daughter's nursery Sports Day and she WAS going to win according to herself. I never won anything in Sports Day during my childhood. I wasn't really that competitive. On reflection I think I thought I couldn't do it so I didn't try. My husband, on the other hand, was very sporty at school and very competitive by all accounts. My mini Jessica Ennis took part in two races and came second then third. Very respectable and she is uber chuffed that she got two stickers.

That was all well and good until the teacher uttered the dreaded words - Parent Race time. This was dreaded for two reasons, firstly I don't want to do it, secondly I know my husband will try to tan everyone else's asses and this could be embarrassing! I was correct on one count, true to form my husband forgot that he was at a preschool Sports Day and left everyone in his wake. He is endearingly proud of himself. All the other parents probably think we are total asses! I had asked him earlier why he had worn his old, grotty work shoes that day. It transpires that this was because they are comfy and he thought he would run faster in them. Like I said, he is competitive!

When it came to the mum's race I grudgingly lined up with the others. Then something crazy happened - it turns out I am competitive too!!! I felt I was going to come last for the first part so something in my brain switched and I ramped it up to come a respectable joint third! Who knew I was a competitive sports woman :) .

After the race everyone had a sticker apart from my son. My husband wasn't giving his up so I had to give him mine as he was crying. He lost it and I am ashamed to say I am a little gutted- I have never won anything at Sports Day before!

Vic x

A sunny day and Jumping Clay

My daughter loves to make things whether it be baking, sticking, painting or dough. The messier the better. I love making things with her (although I develop a nervous tick when all the different colours of play dough get squished together - my personal pet hate! I don't think it's any fun otherwise though!) In order to further satisfy her love of all things messy, today we went off to Jumping Clay (www.jumpingclayscotland.com) and she absolutely loved her (suprisingly unmessy) class.  The class started with a story (The Hungry Caterpillar), she then made her own caterpillar and lollipop out of air drying clay, then coloured in some more food for him. The class cost £5 and was well worth it as she has been talking about it ever since. The lady that runs Jumping Clay, Meabh, was absolutely lovely and even made me a cup of tea. If food is the way to a man's heart, tea is the way to mine so I will definitely be going back! The only drawback was that we were inside for an hour on such a nice day. My daughter was so excited about going though that a suggestion of the park would have been met with outrage.

On the subject of kiddy crafts, below is a link to a really good article on 50 ways with play dough. Who knew you could make so many different types!!! We have made some before and it is a fun and cheap thing to do on a rainy day. Hope you like it.

http://pinterest.com/pin/184929128421536998/

By the way I would like to point out that this is not a sponsored post. We simply had a lovely time at Jumping Clay!

An "Empty"

Yesterday morning I had "an empty". I am not sure if this is a Glasgow thing or not but if you are a teenager and have "an empty" it means parents are out,  party (and chaos) at yours. My husband and his Dad had taken the kids to see Ben and Holly at the Theatre Royal and I had the house to myself for a whole morning. The possibilities were endless. I could do a Homer Simpson and run around in my pants, I could eat chocolate without trying to pretend I'm not when the kids catch me, I could take a shower without a couple of mini Peeping Toms barging in, I could read a magazine cover to cover, I could watch whatever I want on tv... In the end I decided to "just quickly clear up" this turned into a two and a half hour marathon. I am very disappointed in myself. I did manage to have a shower in peace. I was just settling down with the Hollyoaks omnibus when they all arrived home.  Apparently Ben and Holly was good but expensive.

It has been a lovely bank holiday weekend in the sun.

Vic x

Ps. Does anyone know what to do with ten million carrots? I have made carrot muffins, about to make carrot soup. I am then off down the street to try and find some hungry rabbits. I think they have been multiplying in my fridge (the carrots - not rabbits - that would be awful but solve my problem). I feel I can't throw them out as I have my mum saying "think about all the starving children in the world" in my head. I was a fussy eater as a child and heard this a lot!

Bingo wings and a Rant

Hi, I am starting with my rant first. Why oh why do advertisers think it is ok to target little children with their ads for plastic rubbish? I am actually fed up with seeing all the trash on tv and filling little minds with the idea that they simply must have x,y or z to make them happy. I am not turning on kids channels with advertising any more. My daughter has declared that she simply must have a blanket that doubles up as a puppet(?!??!!!). What is she planning to do? Practice ventriloquism when in bed at night? I also don't like the "happiness comes in a box" McDonalds ad - I think it's a bit sinister!

Rant over, bingo wing update! I have completed the Tracy Anderson DVD twice so far this week. If I can do it again tomorrow that will be three times in a week which is ok but not as good as I would have liked. Tracy suggests doing it six times a week along with her cardio dance workout six times. She is obviously not a mother from Glasgow or else just doesn't go to bed! It is horrible but I already feel a bit better as I am "re-engineering my muscular structure" according to old Trace. There is a standing abs section which makes me feel like I am at the Shed (Glasgow nightclub) slightly worse for wear and throwing some shapes. I don't look elegant. Food wise I was doing well until last night when I had a Dairymilk shaped epic fail! Never mind! It is a bank holiday after all. I am sitting with a glass of wine at the moment. What would Tracy Anderson say???

Hope you all have a fabulous bank holiday.

Vic x

Mrs Bloom I ain't!

The washing pile could touch the sky.
The toddler is crying - I don't know why.
The sun is shining, exposing smears everywhere.
There is something sticky in my hair.
I am tripping over toys everywhere I turn.
I have forgotten to check dinner and I can smell it burn.
The garden is a jungle - weeds everywhere.
I really wish I didn't care!

Yesterday was manic Monday and the above chronicles exactly how I was feeling. I was having an Upstairs Downstairs kind of day - I was working downstairs! Housework sucks!!!

The onset of warmer weather is brilliant but has added "gardening" to my list of chores. I actually quite like doing it but it is time consuming. I have come over all "Mr Bloom" and told my kids they could help. I obviously forgot that one year olds and three year olds don't always follow instructions to the letter - we ended up in a big old mess. I am sure some dirt was consumed by my son. He has previous for chowing down on house plant dirt so he must think that Christmas has come in the garden! The kids enjoyed themselves which is the main thing. Now lets see if I mange not to kill the new plants over the summer (I have previous on this!).

Vic x

Get moving and stop chewing!

I am going away for the weekend soon and, as I mentioned in a previous post, I am feeling like the dough woman. I was doing really well with exercise, then hurt my foot which has been the perfect excuse to stop. This is coupled with the fact that my son developed a severe dislike of going in the buggy (doing that rigid thing so that I couldn't get him in) which meant that I have been driving when I would usually walk. And I have been eating loads of chocolate - let's just throw everything into the ring!

Anyway, time to get moving and stop chewing! I am a self confessed exercise dvd junkie. I have them all - I dont necessarily do them but I have them! I flit about them all the time but I think I am going to concentrate on consistently doing the same one for a while. I have chosen the Tracy Anderson mat workout. My friend did this before her wedding and looked uber fabby on the day (just giggling to myself because the predictive text changed this to uber flabby - the complete opposite of the truth - imagine if I hadn't spotted this and a thirty year friendship went down the drain!).

Tracy works you hard. I am sure she is a laugh down the pub but she doesn't let this side to her personality shine through in the video. In fact she is quite glum. I quite like this about her though. If I wanted a laugh when exercising I would go back to pensioner aqua aerobics. I accidentally attended this class when I was pregnant. I am not sure I felt the burn but the chat was great. And who knew you could get an Everly Brothers Megamix set to the beat! The Tracy dvd is hard, it's horrible but it certainly works if you are consistent.

I am also going to swim when I can and cut down on the sweeties and walk more (son has given up fight against buggy). It's hard to fit this all in but will be worth it. I am hoping that mentioning it on here will help me actually do it! I was also thinking that if I can give up sweeties during the week I might treat myself to a Sunday pudding. Sunday pudding club! Send decadent recipes my way and I will aim to deserve them.

Vic x

# I'm losing my mind!

I recently joined Twitter. I don't have any followers - I merely wanted to follow some celebs. It is as unintellectual as that! The hash tag is big on Twitter. I don't actually really know its full correct use in the English language but on Twitter you can use it for anything. The only problem is that this little thing is infiltrating my brain. I am now thinking in hash tags!!! Here are some examples:

- When taking my sleep rollers out I was left with giant hair. First thought was #haircouldreachthemoon.

- I could hear my kids fighting. First thought was #siblingwar.

- My cat went missing and I was walking the streets looking for her. My head was saying #scanningforroadkill. Thankfully the cat returned safe and well.

I need it to stop! I am worried that my children are going to reach a certain age and start speaking in hash tags. I look back fondly on the days when the only means of communication, apart from good old fashioned chatting or post, was the phone in the hall. It wasn't even portable. Perhaps I should return to this in my house #fuddyduddymumma.

Vic x

An exciting day!

I have had lots of exciting days in life - getting married, having babies, discovering eyeliner and Prince Phillip telling me I had nice teeth (I will explain later). This morning was exciting because I got to be an extra on a new Channel 4 programme with Kirstie Allsopp. The actual being an extra bit was pretty boring to be honest - lots of hanging around- but seeing Kirstie at work was brilliant. She is a property/ crafting goddess, had a lovely cardigan on and was really nice too! She referred to us as her "background lovelies". I love the Allsopp!

The reason I ended up there was super random - I don't want you to think I do this kind of thing all the time. I am usually at Bookbug on a Thursday!

To explain the Prince Phillip thing, a long time ago my sister got tickets to a Garden Party in Edinburgh. My mum, two sisters and I went along. We were picked at random to meet Prince Phillip. I panicked as I was actually a month or so too young to be there and my sister panicked because she hadn't shaved her legs properly! When he enquired as to "what one does" I couldn't tell him I was still at school and give away my age so I told him I was a dental student (?!??) - quick thinking on my part. This prompted him to tell me that I had nice teeth. He was very charming. Random story but there you go. I hope I don't get thrown in the Tower of London for admitting I have fibbed to Royalty!

My daughter is now summoning me to play with plastic ladybirds so I am off.

Till next time!
Vic x

Things I would like to ban from my house!

It's manic Monday again and as I am rushing around tiding I am realising that there are a few things which would make my life easier if banned from my house:

1. Cheerios
When I sleep a little Cheerio army march around my house and snuggle into random places just to annoy me. My husband once found Cheerios in his shoes. How on earth do Cheerios get into your shoes???

2. Weetabix
Still with the cereal family, the Weetabix I buy seems to be infused with "Hard as Nails". Turn my back on it for a minute and it forms little Weetabix gargoyles all over the floor and high chair. They don't want to come off either!

3. Pop up books
I put this on the list with a heavy heart as pop up books are lovely - until my children get over enthusiastic with them. We now are the proud owners of books such as "Ready to Rock Mr Decapitated Crock".  Book ripping is a big crime in my house.

4. Stickers
Self explanatory!

5. Glass Doors
As I am cleaning one side my son is kissing the other side. It is a pointless exercise.

I am sure there are a million other things which should be banned. What would you ban from your house?

Vic x

Mini Adventure - Thomas the Tank Engine

I mentioned in my list that I was going to try and do something different with the kids each week. Not necessarily something costly or that costs anything at all -  just something fun. This week was a good one as we had tickets to go and see Thomas the Tank Engine at Bo'ness station. It was quite good value for money - £10 a head and nothing for the littlest one. For that we saw Thomas, Percy and Diesel, met the Fat Controller and had a ride on a steam train. The kids were given a Thomas book each and a certificate. I didn't feel ripped off at any point by merchandise stalls. It was very busy, especially on the platform where the parents were literally pushy! This was the only real drawback.

Although we had seen all the Sodor lot, the highlight of my daughter's day was the puppet show. My husband and I are not particularly members of the PC brigade but we were laughing in slight horror as Punch beat Judy with a stick then abused his baby to the point that the baby's head fell off. Our daughter on the other hand was creased up in laughter. She is obviously not a member of the PC brigade either! 

All in all we had a great afternoon and I would recommend it to any Thomas fans out there. I will post some photos when I work out how to do it.

Hope you all had a lovely weekend

Vic x

Smitten Saturday

Today I am taking part in Glasgow Mummy's Smitten Saturday. A kind of show and tell for something you are loving this week. You can find a link to Glasgow Mummy's blog at the side of the page.

As I previously reported the sun came out this week and I was the colour of rice pudding. I have resolved this with the purchase of Bobbi Brown's Sunless Self Tanner for face and body. This is hands down the best fake tan I have ever used as I am now neither streaky nor the colour of a fence.

I have previously not really been that into the Bobbi Brown range as I thought it was a bit "beige". Anyone that knows me knows that I like a statement lip so I thought it wasn't for me. I like a bold lip so much that I nearly called this blog "Lipstick Vic". On reflection, however, I thought this sounded slightly wrong on some levels and I didn't want to disappoint any dirty wee googlers out there with a misleading title!

Back to Bobbi Brown - I will definitely be trying out more of her products when pennies allow.

What would Beyonce do?

Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to read my blog. Your comments are much appreciated and I have now come out from under the bed! After hitting the "share link" button yesterday I did experience mild panic and had a few hot flushes but thankfully that has subsided (a bit)!

It is quite hard to put yourself out there. Over the past few weeks I have been seeing subliminal signs everywhere that I should write a blog if I want to and get over the whole shyness part. This was compounded when I read the back page of this month's Glamour magazine. I hadn't bought it for a long time as my magazine addiction was getting out of hand and I had to go cold turkey on them. It is only £1 this month so I made a sneaky purchase while at the supermarket.  On the back page there is an article entitled "What would Beyonce do?". I love it! This may be my new mantra in life. If Beyonce wanted to write a blog she would tease her hair as high as possible and damn well get typing - possibly in sequins! I am going to do the same.

Vic x

Soft play - the modern day mummy torture chamber!

The lovely weather has graced us for one whole day which meant that yesterday afternoon we were off to shelter from the rain at the local soft play. I always have the notion that I will sit with a cuppa in relative peace while my children have a great time, burn loads of energy and go to bed really early that night. Doesn't always work out that way. I hate the following things about soft play:

1. The Stalker Kid
I always seem to pick up a stalker kid who follows us about while his/her parents ignore them. Obviously I have to put on the "I am really nice to little kids" chat but in reality I want to tell them to get lost so that I can concentrate on my own kids. I sometimes try to lose them on the equipment but they always catch up.

2. The Mean Kid
You know the one that tramples over all the others, says mean things, doesn't let others by. Yesterday a girl of about nine was blocking a rope bridge that my three year old was on. Obviously this prompted much howling from my daughter. Even though her grandfather was shouting at her to move she was determined to stay. I will not write down what I thought of her.

3. Standing on undetermined substances in your socks
We have all been there. Something damp spreading over the sole of your sock. You hope it is water. You pray it is only water.

4. Panic as you temporarily can't spot your kid
These places are jungles with hundreds of chimps swinging around. Take your eyes off your little chimp for a second and it's game over for a while. Cue much shouting of their names and frantic searching til they totter into sight completely oblivious.

5. Leaving to go home.
Tears on tap!

Why do we put ourselves through it?

Vic x

Run run as fast as you can - I can't catch you I'm the dough woman!

Yesterday the sun shone over Glasgow - it was rare, it was unexpected and it was marvellous. It also meant that my summer clothes were dragged from the back of my wardrobe and my pasty, grey body was squeezed into them. It wasn't that pretty - neither was my first trip to the gym this morning!

The horror of my "summer body" has prompted my gym come-back. When I say come-back I was never really a gym bunny in the first place but I haven't been for ages. I pounded on the treadmill for a while and went on the cross trainer I now feel the need to do some kind of toning. Any ideas? I will keep you posted on how I get on.  I am trying to stop weighing myself as it fluctuates wildly and that grey bit of plastic in my bathroom can really affect my mood for the day. I have threatened them with the bin but I don't know if I am quite brave enough yet!

What I did notice yesterday was how different everyone is in the sunshine. There were no heads down, bundled in coats, battling against the elements. People were happy. There were also the obligatory young guys who take their tops off as soon as it hits the twenties. I love Glasgow!

Vic x

Manic Mondays

Mondays in my house are not relaxing - mainly because my inlaws kindly babysit for me while I work on a Tuesday thus invoking an all-consuming panic in me to get my house like a show home before they arrive. I dont know why! I try to create the illusion of domestic perfection - homemade banana bread anyone? I rarely achieve half of what I set out to and mostly stuff lots of things in my cupboards. Out of sight out of mind! Mondays are also the days I get ratty with my husband for leaving things lying around and curse anyone who has ever bought any of my kids a lump of coloured plastic that I am now tripping over.

An item on my list is to be more organised which should alleviate this pain. My first step was to read a book which I heard about through the scary mommy blog - From Frazzled to Focused by Rivka Caroline (I am a sucker for this kind of thing). Despite the topic being housework I actually really enjoyed the book and it made sense. Setting aside time to be organised saves so much time and stress in the long run. A lot of the points in the book are fairly obvious but having them set out in one place focuses the mind. Rivka has 7 children so I will trust she knows what she is talking about! I will let you know how I get on " getting more organised".

I wish I had become more organised before now as I am now off to clean into the night and tackle ironing mountain. Hopefully next week things will change!

Vic x